Flaws in personality are common. We all have them. Some people are mean, and some will always try and ‘one up’ a story. Some are overly confident and others are determined they are the worst and will tell everyone they are. I look into my own life and my fault is failed self-worth.
I had a job interview years back, and the one question that put me off of what I was expecting was “What are you looking for in a salary, what is your worth?”
I could not answer that question. I am too quick to look at what I think others are seeing, and the judgment they are casting. I see what I do well, and then slowly pull apart what is not good about what I am doing.
The song that inspired this was “Thoughts” by Sasha Sloan. I attempted to pull the lyrics that really hit close to home, but the entire song is written exactly how my mind works. I make jokes about myself to beat anyone else from doing it. I protect myself by attacking myself before anyone else can.
To hot even closer to home is the following line:
The voice inside my head that’s tellin’ me I’m okay
Entertain it for a second, then I push it away
Yeah, I swear to God I’m tryin’, but I don’t know how to be
How to be a good friend to me.
I know the truth, I can see it and start for it. I then will fail, and fall into the only way I know how to live. I don’t know the answer, but I will continue to try. What more can I ask of myself?