I know how others perceive me, and I hear it constantly, but honestly, none of it truly makes sense to me. There are so many reasons for this confusion, and at times, I just don’t know what to believe. Mostly, it’s like I only see all the negativity overshadowing any positive that others see or try to tell me about. And then, there are moments when I hear something wonderful about myself from someone, only to be followed soon after by hearing about what I am doing wrong. It’s a rollercoaster that leaves me feeling torn and uncertain.
If I could see how you see meI could be a little bit happyAnd through your eyes I realizeI could be a little bit happy
I can’t help but wonder if what others say truly reflects what they are feeling and seeing inside. When someone tells me I am amazing, do they genuinely believe it themselves?
Scars, old scars I keep in jarsCollect them like a badgeWon’t forget the pastThose old, old friends
It’s funny how the older I get, the less I believe what people tell me. So many times I’ve been told I’m “amazing” and “wonderful,” only to be torn down shortly after, leaving me feeling shattered. It’s painful to see the truth of what my friends, family, and partners actually see when they look at me. To hear about all the things I do wrong, right after I’ve been called “perfect,” cuts so deep. It’s disheartening, and it’s a reality I desperately hate living in. I miss ignorance… I miss just thinking I was… me, and that was enough.